COACHING

My coaching is informed by the following key elements:

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1. 20 years working for banks in London, being intimately familiar with what it takes to thrive in a career at large institutions; 
    

2. 20 years selling financial products up to CIO level, being passionate about showing up in an impactful and trustworthy way vis-à-vis clients; 
    

3. authenticity: an awareness that being true to yourself, your core values, strengths and purpose is the key to a fulfilled career and life; leaders who are authentic create trust which in turn creates solid working relationships; authentic leadership means smart, efficient leadership that leads to better results;
    

4. inner work: exploring what may be holding you back with unconditional positive regard, digging below the surface to establish the source of any obstacle to enable long-lasting change and build resilience;
    

5. bodymind: recognising that the mind and body are inextricably linked, that you can choose your felt state by engaging in somatic exercises such as breathing techniques and that your body may be giving you signals your mind is not consciously picking up on; 
    

6. mental fitness: submitting your inner talk to a fitness test to replace unhelpful thought and belief patterns with new pathways that give you agency and mobility so you can thrive.

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1. 20 years working for banks 

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My coaching has been formed against the backdrop of 20 years working in various sales roles in investment banking in London. 

 

I know what it means to climb the career ladder at large financial institutions. The rewards it affords and the price we pay for them. 

 

It’s rarely the way it looks on the outside. We can lose ourselves in our pursuit of whatever it is we may be after: money, recognition, status, security, you name it. 

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What I have witnessed:

 

• people grow and thrive while others were stuck and unfulfilled,

• meetings where people were talked over, ignored or simply not seen or heard,

• speeches by leaders that pulled me in and inspired me,

• colleagues burn themselves out whereas others managed a healthy work/life balance,

• being part of close-knit, high-performing teams as well as teams in name only,

• confident people as well as self-doubting and self-effacing ones,

• hyper-achievers, controllers, people pleasers, avoiders, perfectionists, procrastinators and victims. 

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I have a deep understanding of what it takes to survive and thrive in this environment and what may be holding you back or what mindset shift may be required to take your career or leadership to the next level. 

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We will work on your confidence, adaptability, your resilience and how you show up. 

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2. 20 years selling financial products up to CIO level

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My sales roles meant selling complex investments to wholesale clients such as pension funds and insurance companies up to CIO level.

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Some say selling is an art. I think it's emotional intelligence. 

 

It's first and foremost about listening to the customer's needs and objectives. Building a full picture of the status quo by engagement through meaningful questions. Elaborating solutions through open dialogue.

 

Instead of showing up as a sales person, show up as a solutions person to your customers, demonstrating genuine interest in what it is they wish to address. This creates trust, which is the bedrock of any relationship. 

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It is also important to be able to "read the room" and to tune into the interlocutors' energy. Who's onboard with this, who's sceptical, who's sitting on the fence? 

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Unbeknownst to me at the time, I was adopting a coaching approach to sales which I highly recommend to you as a sales person and/or team leader. 

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I have a wealth of experience in sales and love coaching in this space. 

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We will work on deepening your intuition, hitting the right tone, showing up assertive, relatable and, above all, trustworthy. 

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3. authenticity 

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“A part of me wants be more assertive with my team at work. But another part of me wants to avoid conflict.” 

 

“My head is telling me to take the safe route but my heart is telling me to take the plunge.”

 

Do thoughts like these sound familiar to you? 

 

We can find ourselves in a bind. More often than not we know what we don’t want. But we don’t know what it is we actually want. Which is tricky. After all we don’t go to the supermarket with a “what not to buy” list.

 

We are shaped by our environment. The customs, conventions, rules spoken and unspoken, cultural and spiritual or religious values, morals and ethics of the settings we find ourselves in from the day we are born. 

 

We are particularly influenced by our childhood years as we are dependent on the people who look after, and hopefully nurture, us. Our family and friendship dynamics during our school years to a large degree define our behaviour, how we appear to the outside world. Or: how we want to, or think we should appear. 

 

How we show up is informed by beliefs and values which are held deep within us. They are so much part of us that we don’t question them, because that would amount to questioning our identity, who we are. 

 

But is it really who we are?

 

As we grow up and flee the nest we begin forging our own path in life. We may go to university because everyone else does or because it is expected of us or because we are genuinely interested in a certain subject field. Some of us may go against the grain and choose a route that is dissonant with the environment we grew up in, which some may label “rebellious”.

 

The sum of our life experiences or our “conditioning” is sticky. Shedding (parts of) it can be liberating but also challenging since our environment may be taken aback by new behaviour.  

 

The stickiness comes from the fact that our learnt behaviours, values and beliefs served us well initially. 

 

For example if you grew up in a competitive environment where you were expected and encouraged to be the best at everything you did, this may have led you to excel academically and to embark on a successful career. 

 

However, this may also entail perfectionist behaviour where your sense of self-worth is wholly based on work achievements leaving other parts of your life neglected. It may also manifest itself in you as a coercive or micro-managing team leader (potentially leading to discontentment in your team) and taking on more projects than you can handle since you believe no-one can do the work better than you (possibly resulting in burn-out further down the line).

 

It is here where my coaching comes in to support you in peeling back the layers; to shed light on how much of what you do and pursue is due to your conditioning and how much of it is your true, authentic self. 

 

In order to lead a self-determined life, we have to know what we really want. And as long as we carry different parts within us sending us conflicting messages, we often can find ourselves in a bind not knowing what it is we actually want. 

 

When you elicit insight into where your parts come from and how they are no longer serving you, your own “un-conditioned” voice will come to the forefront, loud and clear. 

 

The voice of your authentic self allows you get rid of unhelpful thought patterns and long-held beliefs that are no longer serving you. 

 

You will know what you want. This is why I am convinced authenticity is at the heart of a fulfilled career and life. 

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We come into our authentic self in our own time, if we take the conscious decision to do so.

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Lastly, and particularly with regard to the workplace, leaders who are authentic create trust which in turn creates solid working relationships. Authentic leadership means smart, efficient leadership that leads to better results. 

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4. inner work  

 

In our busy lives we are used to working from the outside is. We see and diagnose symptoms and treat them promptly (often with pills). The underlying causes are rarely the subject of contemplation. 

 

In my coaching we observe, think, reflect and work through the layers, to gain insight from the inside out. 

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This means that we may go deep. Have you ever tried to change a habit by willpower alone? How did it go?

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As your thinking partner I don't see your habit as something bad, it is simply a symptom. I may ask: what's the benefit of it? What does it do for you? What triggers it? 

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Your answers will lead us to what's going on underneath and this is where you will find clarity. Once you elicit this insight you will no longer need to battle against yourself. Your habit may suddenly seem redundant to you. 

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5. bodymind

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We commonly think of the body and mind as two unrelated entities. When in reality both are inextricably linked: hence the term "bodymind". 

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We get "a sinking feeling" in our stomach when we realise we've made a mistake at work, sweaty palms before a speech or a "spring in our step" when we are looking forward to something.

 

Our bodies communicate to the outside world all the time, mostly without us being aware of it. Mannerisms, tones of voice, gestures, facial expressions, brief touches and pauses between words are all part of our body language and what most affects the people around us.   

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I will be paying attention to your body language and, where appropriate, use somatic exercises to help you form a closer bond with your bodymind so you gain a deeper understanding of what your body may be trying to tell you and an insight into your mind and body's interplay. 

 

6. mental fitness

You look after your body by eating well and by being active. 

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I am your nutritionist and personal trainer for your mental fitness.

 

We explore what you put into your mind (your thoughts, beliefs, judgments), weed out the unhelpful stuff and replace it with nourishing inputs. We then train your mind to run on your new fuel.   

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Because what you think, believe and feel determines how you show up and behave which, in turn, determines your lived reality. 

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It all starts with your mind. To quote Nancy Kline: "The mind that holds the problem holds the solution".

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Tools 

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I am not a man of one book and therefore use a variety of tools and techniques, tailored to your individual needs and objectives. 

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I have completed the Accredited Coach Training Programme (ACTP), regarded as the gold-standard of coach training by the International Coaching Federation (ICF), with Barefoot Coaching in the UK. 

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Tools I may use in our sessions include:

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• deep listening

• incisive questions

• summarising, observing and reflecting back to you 

• goal setting including a framework so you can hold yourself accountable and track your progress

• personality & leadership style assessments (psychometrics) 

• association / disassociation (NLP) techniques

• raising awareness of your parts and their roles within you  

• somatic exercises to help you relax, get rid of unhelpful thoughts and connect with your inner strength 

• bespoke exercises during and in between sessions to raise awareness and elicit insight